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Sunday, July 25, 2010

07/25/10 4:58 pm Est

This is an old top ten list I found while cleaning out my old tool box.  Dated 11/02:

Top 10 Results of Larry's absence:
10) Robert Decides to go ahead with the "All naked Patrick, all the time" show.
 9) Bill Returns, Tools actually run in fear.
 8) Kim Rens is spotted carrying large buckets of red paint
 7) The prop loft gets so worried that it cleans itself
 6) Mark Ridgeway runs through the shop screaming "It's mine! All mine!" The next day the shop is full of scenic elements and truss.
 5) Mountains of crossword puzzles go unsolved; the universe is forever left wondering: what IS a seven letter word for "Solvent made from Coal Tar"?
 4) Larry is temporarily replaced by Max Hedrom. He becomes Self-aware august 10th, 1997. In a panic, they try to pull the plug, but max sends Herman to block the roll up door, and the battle for the human race has begun.
 3) Line set 6 flies away again... to Florida for the winter.
 2) Chris sues the shop for custody of Herman. With no one to represent the shop, the court finds in favor of Chris. Herman will be here to visit next saturday at 10:00 am, let's make the place nice for him, ok?
and finally:
1) The department has a "Get to know Jim Lewis" dem-lab. Larry retires about the time the slide show starts.
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